I will soon get a paycheck for this temporary job of mine, and I am already preparing myself for it.
There is an unbelievable surge of control and emotions that communicate "increased value" when you are handed a paycheck with your name typed out in black ink.
And yet...is it really real, that control and that perceived increased value? Is that "me"?
A few weeks ago I was at the dentist with my son for a routine cleaning and the only magazine that wasn't about cars, animals, or "10 new ways to spark your marriage" (if you get my drift) was a magazine targeting career women. I thought it was my best bet. On about page 5 there was a little article labelled a career-mom's blog.
It went something like this: career-woman becomes unemployed and panics!
The writer lost her job about 4 months previous. One day, her son asked the Dad why he didn't take him to school anymore and it was just mommy who took him, and the dad's reply was because mommy loves you and likes to take you. The kid responded with the saddest comment: No she doesn't, she just doesn't have anything better to do. And the lady signed off her blog with a statement of frustration, she had to figure out a way to "increase her value".
She needed something more... she needed her career to be valuable. Her specific issues weren't about keeping food on the family table or paying the mortgage, but of damaged personal worth.
There are career mom's who have the correct perspective on their true value. I am friends with several of these women and respect the way they strive to meet the challenges in successfully combining family and career as they strive to do it for the glory of God.
And from these past couple of weeks, I have experienced how IT TRULY IS A CHALLENGE!
But I also know that it is very easy to slip into assigning value according to world's standards rather then God's. Funny as this might sound, my occasional job of substitute para-educator has revealed this in me as well.
Money equals value. Career equals value. Title equals value.
{What do you do? I substitute in my kid's school system. Oh, how wonderful!}
{Do you work? I am a para-educator with special needs kids. What a great job!}
And it is a nice job, but is that where I really want to assign my value as a person? Isn't that really just a small facet of the bigger picture of what God has fashioned me to be?
So, in conclusion, this temporary job opportunity has been interesting. I was able to interact with a whole new group of people I otherwise would never have met. I did my job well, made the boss happy, and earned the money I am about to get.
And my value? My aim is for it to rest in centering myself dead center of what God has really called me to be right now in this season of life!
Wife...
Mom...
Ministry/volunteer...
I am available to do what you want, God!
No paycheck, but assuredly increased value in Your eyes.
3 comments:
Welcome home, babe. If you get the itch for a paycheck, you can have mine!
Amen Sister!
Wow! That's great insight! It seems to me that this temp job has paid off in more than a paycheck!
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