Sunday, November 29, 2009

"I wait for the Lord..."

A week ago today (or was it a month ago?!) I blogged my thankfulness for the Psalms. I had found another special thought from God just for me, just for that day. Only it seems it wasn't just for that day as I was to soon find out.

But first things first, here is the verse:

Psalms 130:5 says this, "I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope."

Because that verse leaped off the page at me, I pulled out a pad of paper from my desk and jotted it down quickly before heading off into my Monday of fun hanging out with Big D.

About noon, I noticed some strange changes in my left arm. It was slightly larger then usual, it was a different color then arms are supposed to be, and veins that don't usually show themselves were obvious on my chest and bicep. So I called my favorite doctor, my dad in Oklahoma, and left a casual little message asking for a call back when he got a chance. Meanwhile, Darril and I decided to cash in a gift card at Olive Garden. We had just gotten our food served when the call came and my dad calmly instructed me to go immediately to the ER.

Long story short...I was diagnosed with a DVT (deep vein thrombosis) in my left clavicle and I was admitted. Just like that. No warning.

Even the nicest of hospitals, and I was in a very pleasant one, is still not home. By the middle of that first night, I was going stir crazy.

I felt completely healthy. No fever. No painful symptoms. Yet I was trapped in a drafty hospital gown chained to an IV drip with nothing to do but think or watch t.v. Sleep was hit or miss, with the hospital staff coming in on an average of once per hour to check up on things.

At some point, very possibly my lowest emotional point, it occurred to me how very interesting it was that this month I decided to focus on thanksgiving. (Oh, the irony!)

Tuesday morning my husband showed up with the list of items that I had requested he bring...necessities like makeup and my Bible. And in my Bible he had tucked the slip of paper I had jotted that verse down hours before. There was a reason that verse had popped off the page for me! God knew I was going to need the encouragement.

In answer to fervent prayer, I was able to get home Wednesday night to enjoy Thanksgiving on Thursday with my family. And oh how easy it was to be thankful for everything...everyone together, my children's hugs, my own bed (with J snuggled in next to me just for the special occasion), non-hospital food, privacy...

I am still not completely sure what God would have me to learn in this new opportunity/challenge.

Is it simply a matter of honing my thanksgiving skills? (Thank you God for the opportunity to give myself two shots a day in the tummy so I can be home with the kids and Big D.)

Or do I need a tutorial on "waiting for the Lord" and "hoping in His Word"? (Thank you God for showing me that You are in control and that my grasping for control only stresses me out.)

Or is this not all about just me, but also for someone else whose life touches mine? (Thank you for bringing that sweetheart of a housekeeper into my hospital room each day. Work during the day, classes at night...please bless her, Lord!)

And on a final note today, I am comparing the name of my blog, Biding My Time, and the principle in the verse of "waiting for the Lord". Hmmm.

1 comment:

whimzie said...

So glad you're home.

"Hope" has been one of my theme words over the last few months. Hoping and waiting seem to go hand in hand, I think. I think I'm seeing more and more that I have to put my hope in His word, i.e. what He says, because what I see doesn't always give me much hope.

So are you A-OK now?